What Does Conscious Living Mean to Me?

My mother used to tell me two things.

The first was that children grow up far too quickly and that I should enjoy every stage because before I knew it they would be grown.

The second was that our minds don't age the same way our bodies do. She believed that at some point we settle into who we are—our values, our beliefs, our sense of self—and while our bodies continue to age, our minds often feel much younger than the face looking back at us in the mirror. She would tell me to remember that and to live as much as I could before that happened.

Even though I tried to enjoy every stage with my children, and I think I am, I still somehow turned around and they are sixteen and twelve. Sometimes I find myself wondering how that happened so fast.

When I first started thinking about what I now call conscious living, I didn't even know the term existed.

What I have come to believe is that conscious living is paying attention.

Paying attention to my thoughts.

Paying attention to my choices.

Paying attention to my relationships.

Paying attention to how my actions affect others.

Paying attention to the life that is happening around me while I am busy living it.

And then making intentional choices whenever possible.

More better choices.

For much of my life, I accepted many things simply because they were what I had been taught. Over time, I began asking myself what I actually believed.

I still believe there is a higher power. I believe that higher power is connected to consciousness itself. I believe we are all connected to it and to one another. I believe at its core it is love, compassion, acceptance, understanding, and goodness.

I don't believe any of us truly know all the answers to the big questions of existence. What I do believe is that continued learning, questioning, exploring, and reflecting can bring us closer to understanding ourselves, one another, and the world around us.

I believe learning should never end. I am always reading, questioning, listening, and considering different perspectives. Not because I am searching for someone else to tell me what to think, but because every perspective offers information I can consider for myself.

Another part of conscious living for me is becoming aware of what I allow into my life.

Not just the music I listen to or the news I consume, but also the conversations I participate in, the thoughts I entertain, and the energy I surround myself with.

Over time I realized that constant negativity, criticism, complaining, fear, and anger affect me whether I intend for them to or not.

So I decided to become more intentional about what I allow to take up space in my mind and heart.

Conscious living has also made me more aware of the impact I have on others.

I have always been someone who thinks quickly. Ideas come fast, and words sometimes come even faster. After learning more about ADHD, I began to better understand why I often interrupted people, finished their sentences, or said things before I had fully thought them through.

These days, I try to pause more. I try to consider how my words might be received and whether they are helpful, necessary, or kind.

I've noticed that the more aware I become, the more heard other people seem to feel.

Another thing conscious living has taught me is that I have to make myself part of the equation.

For a long time, I thought putting myself last was the loving thing to do.

But over time I realized that when I neglected my own well-being, everyone I cared about felt the effects of it. I was more stressed, less patient, and less present.

It took a frightening hospital stay for me to fully understand this lesson. At the time, I was caring for young children, helping care for my mother, navigating family stress, and putting everyone else's needs ahead of my own. I wasn't managing my stress well. I wasn't eating well. I wasn't taking care of myself.

Conscious living taught me that taking care of myself isn't selfish.

It's necessary.

If I want to show up for the people I love, I have to show up for myself first.

The same is true for my marriage.

A healthy family doesn't happen by accident. It requires attention, communication, and intention.

When my husband and I invest in our relationship, it benefits not only us but our children as well. They learn what respect, partnership, forgiveness, and love look like in everyday life.

As I've gotten older, I've also become aware of where some of my regrets live.

They live in the moments when I was too busy.

The times I said "not now."

The times I rushed ahead because I felt pressed for time.

I remember walking ahead while my children stayed back with my mother, matching her slower pace. At the time, there were places to be and things to do.

Today, I would give anything to walk beside her again. To hold her hand and move at her pace.

The same is true with our children.

You can't get back the game they wanted to play.

You can't get back the story they wanted you to read.

You can't get back the ordinary afternoon that felt unimportant at the time.

Those moments pass quietly, and before you know it, the little person asking you to play is grown.

That isn't meant to create guilt.

It's simply a reminder to pay attention.

To put down the phone.

To play the game.

To read the story.

To take the walk.

To listen.

For me, conscious living is paying attention to the life I'm living while I'm living it.

Participating in my life instead of simply moving through it.

Pay attention now.

Because now is all we are guaranteed.

You are always welcome here.

🌿WGG